I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
If I ever start a band I'm gonna name it "Nancy Reagan's Vagina"
he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
I think the universe is against us being together. Or maybe it's just god's way of telling me there is a bigger dick out there for me.
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
Unlike bears, this weekend is not the #1 threat to America. It is, however, the #1 threat to my liver
You know it's been a successful day when the only reason you put on a bra was to take off your shirt
50% drunk capacity currently
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
Randomize
