i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
My card got declined when I tried to buy dippin dots at 2 am, the lady gave them to me for free because "I looked like I needed them."
I swear to god if you keep eating my cats food drunk I am going to kick you out of our apartment.
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
Randomize