theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
Why is there a frozen condom filled with water in my freezer?
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
Randomize
