mark looks like s**t tonight! thank da lawd we broke up!
it's mark...i'm guessing you didn't mean to send that to me...
Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
I have new birth control, three bottles of jack, and some coupons for micky d's. You wanna have that sleepover?
When She took off her bra.... A tube of lipgloss, her phone, I.D. And a wad of twenties fell out.... I'm officially no longer a butt man
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
Randomize
