i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
Dude you picked up her Chihuahua and threatened to kill it yelling "it's not cinco de mayo, bitches"
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
I have invented a new sport: freshman-watching. I'm sitting on our porch literally dying watching the freshmen run around trying to find parties
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
Hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking you had a pulse
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
Randomize
