I'm really into asian looking animals
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
You know you're old when you’re masturbating and you pull your hip
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
Randomize
