she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
Oh my god I peed in a park last night and then tried to set off fireworks with a group of middle-aged men
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
I love THIS fish, the rest of the ocean can go fuck itself. I am ahab and he is my whale
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
Randomize