yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
Her one night stand followed us to mass. This is too funny for real life.
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
I just set up a proportion to calculate how much Jolly Rancher vodka I can make with the limited amount of Jolly Ranchers I have. Finally, real-life application of math.
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
Randomize
