It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
Apparently I was telling them, "I AM A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN AND I DON'T NEED YOU TO HOLD MY HAIR," and I pulled my hair back and puked.
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
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