Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
Almost accidentally stole a baby... explain later
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
How weird is it that 2 people I've had sex with have the same birthday and they don't even know each other
Randomize
