We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
After the keg stand you collapsed, hit your head on the floor, started seizing and after 20 seconds got back up and said "hah, I remember my first beer"
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
Randomize
