The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
Stripper told me "sorry i'm not squezing my tits in your face much, I just had a kid and don't want to squirt you in the eye with milk. " in the middle of my lap dance
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
His penis is small and he doesnt like Harry Potter. HE HAS NO REDEEMING QUALITIES WHAT AM I EVEN DOING HERE
i told the cop we knew everyone at the party, it was 250 of our closest friends and she's like funny nobody on the balcony knew whose house this was
Thats why they were on the balcony!
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
This is my life. Enjoy the view
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
Randomize
