I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
walking in back of a girl wearing booty shorts, a halter and a bracelet that says trainwreck. I don't get it. The first day of nice weather and all the whores come out, are they like hibernating bears or something?
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
you spent the rest of the night making a recipe for mixed drink called "the new years bowel remover". it has 13 parts but judging from the bold all caps, the boiled avocado is the most important
i just figured out how to balance my wine bottle on my boobs so that i don't have to tip it with my hands...breathing has new meaning
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
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