I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
proudest moment: just made a guy walk into a parked car with his mouth hanging open cause of the shirt im wearing.
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
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