he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
I just realized I've stolen a hat from every guy I fucked. Except the last one. Maybe there is hope for me.
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
No he didn't understand the sequence...then I started texting him these texts with vagina strategically spelt correctly in jumbles of letters.
Your mom just threw up on me. Please come home.
Well, my nose won't stop bleeding from really bad cocaine and my purse is full of plastic gold coins. Also, someone saved in my phone as "tyrannosaurus sex" won't quit texting me. Savannah won. Let's put it that way.
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
It was his birthday this weekend. I had to carry him 6 blocks, in 3 inch heels. The entire time he was trying to molest me, eat my face, and try to stop every two feet to tie his shoe. He would light a cigarette, forget about it, almost burn everyone, throw it out, then decide he wanted to smoke. He kept repeating that he trusts me with his life.
...Wow...
I could be a kindergarten teacher
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
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