he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
There was a reason that "Throat Warrior 2011" was written on my martini glass. He said my title was undisputed.
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
I mean.. listen to "Put It In My Mouth" and you'll get the gist of my voicemail for you.
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
dont go in the freezer to fetch your weed. my vibrator may or may not be in there. not sayin, just sayin
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