Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
I seriously need to stop naming my lingerie sets after the boys I wear them for. I seriously just asked mom if she put Brett in the dryer
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
Is Oprah even human
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
If people had ratings on Tinder I'd give you 5 out of 5 stars.
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
Randomize