no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
I am 95% sure I just heard my cat say "What are you doing home? It's Saturday night."
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
When my parents ask, do you think "he was the cop I gave head to in order to get out of a speeding ticket" will suffice as to how we met?
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
Randomize
