I swear ... this hickey is a map to Amelia Earhart's whereabouts
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
Randomize
