i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
I tried to cut him off and he said "I was the president of a fraternity for 3 years, I could outdrink God."
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
I feel like emojis are just meant for explaining sex without using words to make anyone uncomfortable. It's a true gift
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
Randomize
