Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
The fact that you're allowing Santa to dry hump your ass is sort of a dealbreaker
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
I screenshoted his dick pic the other day because it literally looked like a brontosaurus. Like that really tall dinosaur that eats grass. Like I wanna draw a face on it.
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
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