Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
Everything's fine I'm just stoned and my pillows are too soft.
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
I recently had a rabies scare because I thought putting socks on my hands to pick up a squirrel that got in my house was a good idea.
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
you're hired as official boob wrangler
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize