Flirting with the rich sleazy owner of the club: 1 way ticket to free sushi, drinks, and VIP passes. FUck! im better with older men than i am with babies and dogs
I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
Ok I can't be your drugdealer AND booty call AND friend. It just doesn't work that way
Paying 5 grand for boobs is saving me like 10 grand in weed
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
Taking Gomer to the ER. He tore something trying to stretch his nutsack enough to put his balls in his own ass. I need new friends.
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
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