summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
He fucking owes me dinner after I gave him head under the deck behind the bar.
Then my mouth guard fell out of the hole, so that's how the dog poop got in my mouth.
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
I'm sorry about your car but on a brighter note I did wake up in my dorm. That's something right?
Fuck you.
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
I caught her walking around with a fake mustache, wearing a sombrero and holding an empty carton of milk. She's a hopeless cause.
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
I found your missing hash cookies. Fuck you and I'm sorry but there are only 2 left. I already had the munchies.
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
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