I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
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