I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
you didnt know i had herpes?
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
I got to the party and found your shoes in a bag of Funyuns. You weren't even there.
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
She tried to subtly measure me, but I noticed. She told me I barely made the cut otherwise there would have been just a handshake as a parting gift.
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
He literally stole all the change that was on my floor and ran away while I was peeing. I have to rethink my standards.
Randomize
