I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
I somehow fell asleep on my kitchen counter using the microwave as a pillow
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
Did I, at any point last night, say I was dying?
You're a hot mess, you know that?
At least I'm a FUN hot mess. Like a train crash full of pizza, fireworks and glitter.
I woke up at 4am because the neighbors cat managed to sneak into my bed. HOW THE FUCK DOES THIS STUFF HAPPEN TO
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
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