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wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
i need a new camera phone. my pictures from last night are as blurry as my memories. and neither tell me why i woke up in an airplane hangar.
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
Swear. I think after passing out in a community college parking lot I can safely nominate myself for the piece of shit of the year award
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
It's like trying to pry an octopus off you. Except the octopus speaks English and can get drunk.
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
i can't even hate his new girlfriend cuz she survived a fucking brain tumor. like that's just not fair.
Randomize
