Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
I wish life had little blips of pornography
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
Just grabbed my laptop and a beer to take a shit. Mom gave me a look of disgust. I miss college.
Today the house voted to defund Planned Parenthood but to continue funding NASCAR. I fucking hate everything.
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
Please stop hiding condoms in my house. If I want to have sex with you, I will let you know. FYI, my mom found the ones hidden behind the milk. She was not happy.
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
You didn't try to help me when I fell on the dance floor. She brought me cupcakes. You're a shitty friend, suck your own dick.
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
"Local woman assaults strangers with sex toy" is a headline I never want to be about me.
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
Randomize