ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
We left the knife in your bed.
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
Bruce the cab driver wants to take me on a date to see Taken 2
Shit. I'm suppose to call the bank but I'm too high to talk numbers.
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
Randomize
