i just ran into my boss at the liquor store. we didnt exchange words, just nodded in mutual understanding.
Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
WHEN THE FUCK DID MCDONALD'S DECIDE TO QUIT SERVING BURGERS AT 1:00AM?
I would peed on everything
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
Hey does the gas gauge in your car work?
Nevermind...we figured it out. Heres a more relevant question, does your insurance have roadside assistance?
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
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