Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
is there a legit reason for the weird voicemail I got at 2:14am?all I could make out was 'help me' 'two hours' and 'toilet butt'. wtf did u drink.
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
Yeah, you gave me a condom that I 100% coulda used, then an hour later you basically beat the shit out of me and physically took it from my pocket.
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
Randomize