i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
I may or may not have started my period at the bar. Good thing I have dark jeans on.
I think I just saw someone hide a body.
Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
i could't wear that belt anymore, it was gonna make me keep shitting for the rest of the night
You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
He pulled out a coupon for $2.50 off the crab cakes and expected us to share that as a meal. Is that the kind of person you really see me dating?
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