But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
YOU SUCK AT REPLYING IM IRRESPOSNIBLY DRUNK WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING WITH YOU LIFE. celebrate the magicness with me.
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
You kept trying to use my cat as a napkin.
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
I'm currently trying to figure out a way to fill the bathtub up with mashed potatoes so when he comes over he'll know what's about to hit him..
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
Randomize
