Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
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