Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
I found my crush's facebook page. And his wife's. Apparently they are still in love. Of all the people to have happy marriages! Fuck, I'm depressed.
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
Must've forgot to hang up with her when I was telling Josh I plan to pop champagne if I nail her tonight. She showed up with a bottle and said "only if we can toast it with Josh"
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
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