so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
He started using my brother's rc helicopter as a beer delivery device. He's a drunk McGyver.
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
Holy sore nipples Batman
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
He came home at 2 AM on roller skates with his hair dyed pink while singing "Sweet Transvestite" and throwing glitter on all of us and everything we own. We had to call a cleaning guy.
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
Randomize
