Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
Oh you know, sitting here in my bathing suit watching antiques road show and petting the cat. Just the usual
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
I found a briefcase foll of fireworks in my old bedroom...that's an appropriate thing to bring to a wedding, right?
Look man if you're looking for a voice of reason, you're talking to the wrong woman.
Thanks to you I can't show my boobs tomorrow for the interview.
You came in wearing a whipped cream bikini what did you think would happen
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
whole 5th of capt = waking up in the shower after 2 hours and the whole house asking why i'm STILL in a towel. and me having nothing to say
Randomize
