Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
My Sexting was not on an AP level
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
no no no no you can't just say your dirtiest secret is "i sat on goldfish by accident once" and just leave i have QUESTIONS
AT LEAST TELL ME IF THE GOLDFISH WAS STILL IN A BOWL??????????????
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