after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
bad: friday night i tripped and fell outside my dorm. worse: i just found out i broke my ankle. worst: i was shitfaced and don't remember any of this.
Id love to say been there done that but im a slutty drunk not a stupid one.
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
I called 911 when they kicked me out of the bar last night.
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
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