I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
Also I want everyone to be drunk at my funeral. Instead of wearing black just blackout. That way everyone can celebrate how fun I was
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
future reference: when you get a text that says "WARNING: EXPLICIT PHOTOS BEING DELIVERED. VIEWERS DISCRETION IS ADVISED." you always open the attached picture.
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
90% sure I just opened a snapchat of you in a fuzzy bathrobe next to your ceiling collapsing
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
Randomize
