hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
I’ll call you later. There’s a jilted trophy wife looking for a revenge fuck at my door
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