R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
Yeah, half my ass was burnt and I was missing a shoe. I'm blaming you for the shoe.
Between my vibrator and my iPhone carpal tunnel is inevitable.
If you were a real friend you would have told me you saw me in a porno despite how awkward of a convo it is. You act like I should always know when I'm being recorded.
I could have made money off of that but no you had to wait 2 years to drunkenly tell me this shit.
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
Randomize
