turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
apparently "my dealer got arrested" is not an acceptable answer when mom asks "What happened? You look sad today"
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
where are you?
Hypothermia
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
I had sex while you were puking this morning and I'm sorry. Kind of.
It's ok. I had sex while you were drunk crying last night. We're even.
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
Randomize
