she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
I'm sitting next to some random guy in a gorilla suit drinking out of a bottle of vodka.
He's majoring in Religion
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
Woman at starbucks on her computer with a garbage bag of popcorn and a bottle of lotion. Where are you coming from?!
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
Randomize
