no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
Have you ever come so hard that right after you have the urge to yell "make me a sandwich!"? ...I think my ovaries turned into testicles.
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
Randomize
