Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
They only remember me when they're drunk...I'm like a suppressed memory.
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
I just stood up and am wasted. I think I just admitted to my mom that I am trying to fuck everyone in New York because they're skinny and ethnically ambiguous. Meanwhile, happy hour isn't over yet.
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
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