In all seriousness though I just found out the dog pissed in my bed it'd be nice to crash somewhere other than my couch while my piss soaked bedding is in the washer
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
I just closed two deals on my laptop from my bathroom while smoking a bowl, like a bawssss. Working from home is my favorite.
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
You were out of control then you fell asleep on his lap for 30 min and woke up civil. Way to powernap to sobriety!
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
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