it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
she always made me post sex PB&Js it was like fucking a trashier Martha Stewart
Dignity is for republicans.
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
If you binge watch Bill Nye Saves the World without me you can consider yourself single
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
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