i was like. eff you dude i'm 100% american. i went to a high school prom and i like springstein songs and i take rides in chevrolets.
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
Randomize
