well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
So the girl I met at the bar last night came home with me. Played with my puppy. And left.
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
Randomize
