My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
i wanna have a kid now so by the time he's 20 ill only be 42 and assuming im already divorced we can pick up girls together
Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
The bouncer at this strip club is my new best friend. He is also very persuasive. He got me to strip onstage for a t shirt. It's a nice shirt.
When you have to have Siri remind you that you're on your period cuz you're so drunk you keep forgetting about tampons it might be time to call it a night.
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
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